So I got silent. I tried to withdraw from the usual chit chat - "fom" taking a new meaning as frustration of missing out - , avoided drinks with friends & clients altogether - ordering syrup instead of beer or wine being a fairly straight give-away!
Why such taboo? It never made much sense to me, but I felt the pressure anyway. Let's see :
"That's private" ... what about pics of newborns? injuries? they don't shock anyone, do they?
"Pregnant women don't have to take it easy" That made a title in the Washington post (!!!), so what I am even talking about?
"If you feel that way, maybe you should'nt have a baby" - or maybe I'm just being honest?
Or simply, "she should'nt tell anyone so early". In case things go wrong, of course. Well I thought I would experiment and see if that made sense for me. Hope for doctors's empathy to replace the understanding you'd get from your friends? Good luck with that. Know what to expect? Hardly any chance. Get back to normal as if it didn't happen? I wished. I really do .... Bottom line, when it hurt most is when I most felt the need to talk.
So I'm back. Sadly, back to the starting gate and not any stronger for it. But more importantly, I'm back talking, chatting, sharing and when or if I'm pregnant again, I won't shut myself off - not just because I'm expected too.
#untold #accesstheinaccessible #mountainhardwear